Kettle Honey Dijon

Honey dijon seems like such a weirdly specific chip flavor.  Not just honey mustard, but honey dijon.  That distinction is maybe important.  Equally possible that it's not important!  I also like how the bag is very very orange.  It's like a pumpkin.  So festive.

The bag is pretty small, and there are even fewer chips.  Not off to the best start if these are delicious.  But, on the other hand, if they're terrible... I don't have to eat as many!

But what do they taste like?
Very strongly of honey mustard.  And... maybe a little dijon?  There's a kick to this honey mustard, but it is definitely honey mustard.  The only problem is that Kettle chips tend to be weirdly greasy in an unpleasant way.  I always feel like I need to wipe my hands after every chip.  They are pretty salty as well which I enjoy.

Sometimes the flavor seems to be a little inconsistent - some chips have a very strong taste and others less so.  It is a very sweet honey mustard for the most part - there's a bit of a bite, but it's mostly pretty mellow.  I wish they weren't greasy kettle chips, but the flavor's tasty!  Would buy again, but only if I had napkins on hand to get rid of the grease.  Tooooo greasy.

Rating

Walkers Quavers

Billed as a 'light curly potato snack' I somehow thought these would be like Cheetos.  They are not!  Well - they might be taste-wise, but they aren't shape...wise.  Got these at the British shop where I've purchased some other goodies.  Actually... I probably need to go back soon.  Anyway - these are 'cheese flavour' so I expect these will taste like cheese.

Off the bat - I was confused by the shape.  They look like Fritos, but smell like Cheetos!  How do they do such sorcery?

But what do they taste like?
A little, and not unpleasantly, like a cheese Funyun.  And... I'm kinda okay with that.  It's like a Funyun without all the little nibblies that fall off of it, and with a hint of cheese.  Salty, yet a little savory, but mostly salty.  The cheese is pretty fake tasting, but that's to be expected really.

Eating them is noisy, but the actual chip isn't hard - it's rather soft.  They're also weird shapes which is fun, but sometimes hard to grab a handful as bits fall off.  I mostly taste salt over cheese, but hey - I am a big fan of salt, so that's no problem for me.  I think I'd like these better if they were cheesier (hey - they're cheese flavour - I want what I pay for), but I am rather fond of them.

I'd definitely get these again, despite the cheese tasting a little chemically.  There's something fun about eating them and how noisy they are while also being delicious.  They're almost a little too salty, but not enough that it bothers me.

Rating

Mike Sells Green Onion

Weirdly named, but hopefully delicious... I bought these in an airport in Ohio.  Apparently they're delicious and well known in the region (and possibly more places!  I don't know!), but I'd never heard of them.  Still... I am a big fan of sour cream and onion chips, so I can only hope green onion is equally delicious.  I don't usually eat green onions so... not sure what to expect here.

I kinda expected them to have ridges, but I'm not sure why.  They do not, in fact, have ridges.  They also don't have a lot of seasoning nibblies on them.  I hope they still have flavor!  Also, I dropped a bunch right before I started this review and I'm sad now.

But how do they taste?
Salty and onion-y.  I'd prefer they be stronger actually.  Well - that the onion be a little stronger cuz they mostly taste salty.  I like the flavor, but it just doesn't pack enough of a punch for me.  Where is the green onion?  It's kinda there, but it's also not there.  I like my chips to have a lot of flavor and these are just kinda lacking.  The taste that's there is good and I definitely like them, but I'd like them a lot better if there was less salt and more onion.

 

It might be kinda silly, but I wish these had more onion nibblies on them as well.  At first glance it seems like they're plain and some seasoning got on one or two by accident.  It don't know if the reason why they taste more like salt than onion, but there's no way to be sure.

To sum it up... these are good chips, but pretty uninteresting.  I'd get 'em again sure, because they' basically sour cream and onion with more salt than sour cream, but will I crave Mike Sells brand?  Probably not.

Rating

Ruffles Cheddar & Sour Cream

I've seen these around enough places that I'm not sure they qualify as 'strange', but I've never tried them before so I think that counts.  I usually don't like Ruffles that much (at least compared to other, similarly flavored chips) because they always taste greasy I think.  But... here goes nothin!

At first look they're practically neon which is a little unappealing.  I usually think of Cheetos as radioactive, but I suppose these are too.

But what do they taste like?
Wow.  They taste exactly like cheddar and sour cream, but also Ruffles.  Maybe off brand sour cream.  Or sour cream that's nearly past its prime?  They're pretty good, though.  They don't taste as greasy as Ruffles usually do which is a major plus.  It's just that the sour cream tastes a little off.  I realize that it's not actually sour cream so it doesn't matter, but a tiny part of me thinks 'wait... has this sour cream gone bad?'.  Maybe I just don't eat sour cream enough to know the taste properly?

Still... these taste pretty good.  It's kinda like I'm eating Ruffles that I've dipped in sour cream, but without needing a dip on hand.  The cheddar flavor is pretty subtle - kinda overpowered by the sour cream, but it's there.  I think these would be better with a stronger cheese to sour cream ratio maybe.  I dunno, but I am impressed how spot on the flavor is.  It's not the best cheddar or the best sour cream, but it does taste like what it says on the bag, plus a weird chemically flavor that I've come to expect from Ruffles.  Would buy again, but not often I think.

Rating

Bissli Falafel Flavor Wheat Party Snack

I have no idea what these are.  Well... that's not entirely true.  My friend got these for me (thanks!), but they're falafel flavored wheat party snacks.  So... I understand what they are, but not how they came to be I suppose.  Was there a falafel shaped hole in the chip market?  Evidently.  I do like falafel so these could be pretty delicious!

First thoughts: they're like the nibbles that go on top of salads.

But what do they taste like?
They taste a lot like falafel actually, but they're far crunchier than I thought they'd be.  And a little saltier, which is never a bad thing.  But these actually do a pretty good job of tasting like falafel!  It's just the super crunchiness that's a little weird.  I expect something that tastes so much like falafel to be softer I guess?

Otherwise these are pretty good!  If you don't like falafel you won't like these either because its' really kinda amazing how much they taste like an actual falafel.  They are truly falafel flavored.  I do wish that they weren't so crunchy, but otherwise I'd eat them again.

I guess the biggest problem is that they have a very specific flavor.  Most chips I'm happy to eat whenever, but these I feel like I'd need to want to eat falafel.  Oh man - I just realized... I bet these would go great with humus.  Anyway... if you like falafel and happen to see these weird chip type things... give 'em a shot!

Rating

 

Barcel Mini Takis Fuego

Sorry for the delay on this!  Christmas had me all tied up, and I missed my usual Tuesday post.  So... here's a Wednesday post?  I bought these the same place I bought last week's Barcel Chipotles Chipotle & Cheese, as they seemed intriguing and were a small bag so if they're crap then hey - at least there aren't many.

At first glance these seem pretty much exactly like the Doritos Dinamita Chile Limon chips I tried a few months ago.  I've also, via the internet, discovered the Fuego means fire?  Apparently I'm in for some mouth burn-y ness.  Hooray?  I should've known when the bag said it was a 'hot chili pepper & lime flavored corn snack'.

But what do they taste like?
Not fiery pain at first - they're actually pretty good.  A very lime-y type thing going on.  But then the pain.  Ow - it was so strong I actually coughed, just because what else was there to go?!  Trying again.  A bit better this time, but then as soon as I try to actually eat the chip, rather than just chew it, it burns my throat something fierce.  Spike-y bits of ow that still make me cough.  There's kinda... no way around it which is a bummer, as I like how they taste.  Even the mouth burn I'm getting isn't unpleasant... it's just the fact that I can't actually eat them without my throat hurting.  It's a bit better with each subsequent chip, but it still hurts.

At first bite they actually taste a lot like Fritos and then there's a kinda nice chili-lime flavor, but then I try to swallow and pain.  I can't eat these in polite company, or in any company for that matter!  I'd just be sitting there coughing, with my eyes watering and my nose running.  That sounds super appealing, no?

The problem is... I actually kinda like the flavor.  Despite the pain... I keep eating them.  It helps a little to take a drink of water while eating, which kinda dilutes it, but defeats the purpose of a chip really.  So, while I like the flavor, I can't eat them without coughing and having mouth pain so I can't really rate these highly.  Still... I do like the flavor if only it didn't try to hurt me.

Rating

 

Barcel Chipotles Chipotle & Cheese

I saw these chips in several different stores, in equally battered bags, before finally finding a not destroyed bag in Brooklyn.  Am I excited to try these?  Not... particularly.  The cheese appears to be Swiss, which I'm not a huge fan of, and the chipotle part of it seems to just be a wrinkly pepper.  Awesome.  BUT!  I am trying these chips for SCIENCE!  Not to enjoy them!  Okay... sometimes to enjoy them.

These are corn chips, which I only realized when I dumped them onto the plate.  It says on the bag, but I apparently chose to ignore it.  I'm unsure why they're corn chips, or if it will make for a better experience.  I suppose we shall see.  Some of the chips are covered in the seasoning, while others seem to be a bit skimpy.  As far as the smell... have you had Japanese seaweed salad?  They smell kinda like that.  Promising!

But what do they taste like?
Very corn chip-y.  Then there's the painful spice, but it's more of a spicy salsa burn, rather than just pain (which I've found in other chips).  On the first bite I actually taste a slight hint of the cheese and it actually tastes a little like Swiss.   Well done, bag designer.  You know... weirdly, and despite making my eyes water a little, I kinda like these.  Yeah, they're painful, but the flavor is kinda working for me.  There's sort of a... smoothness, that I expect is the 'cheese' part and then a pretty strong spice kick that's the chipotle.  But it's more than just spice - it's spice with flavor.  Weirdly, the first flavor I taste each bite is a bit like what it smells like which is still that strange seaweed salad flavor.  Not super appealing, but it gets better from there.

Also, they're kinda shaped like apostrophes, so that's fun!  I do, in fact, think the corn chip helps these out.  There's something nice about the solid chip with all this spiciness, instead of something flimsy.  I wasn't kidding about my eyes watering, by the way.  They totally are.  And yet... I keep eating these because, pain aside, they actually taste pretty good.  I don't think I'd get them often, as they are kinda really hurting my mouth, but I'd eat them again, assuming I had some tissues handy.

Rating

Kettle Buffalo Bleu

So here's the thing.  I loves me some buffalo wings.  But... and here's the critical bit... I love them dipped in ranch dressing.  None of this bleu cheese with its weird mold veins.  No thank you, sir.  BUT!  My friend said these were super good and even suggested I might enjoy them!  With a recommendation like that, how could I resist?

Kettle bags seem to be pretty small, I've noticed.  While other brands (Lays, for one) seem to be making even bigger 'regular' size bags, Kettle seems perfectly content to keep their little brown bag.  More power to you, Kettle!  They certainly don't smell like bleu cheese or buffalo wings.  They smell like... something, though.  What is it?  I'm not sure, but I don't feel positive about it.  Also... why are there green nibblies?  Green nibblies makes me think sour cream and onion!  Oh, chips... you're not off to a good start.

But what do they taste like?
Not like buffalo or bleu.  They're also pretty thick chips which makes them annoyingly hard and very loud to chew.  Kettle cooked chips should be thin, otherwise you run into this issue!  Right right, but the taste.  I've only had one chip and already the roof of my mouth is tingly burning.  It's not unpleasant, but it doesn't taste like anything either.  I really have no idea what Kettle was going for with these.  They don't taste like buffalo or bleu.  They taste more like grease and spicy.  I'm just sort of mindlessly eating them at this point.

If you like Kettle chips of mysterious flavors then perhaps you'll like these?  Otherwise... I'd stick with a different chip.

Rating

Nathan's Honey Mustard Crunchy Crinkle Fries

I don't eat Nathan's fries (or Nathan's at all for that matter) that often, but when I do I usually douse them in fake cheese because fake cheese improves 78% of foods (science fact!).  I don't think I've ever had Nathan's honey mustard fries.  I don't even know if they exist outside of this bag.  The bag also tells me that it's 'all about the crunch' which I feel is not the case with french fries.  Clearly these are some hybrid chip fries.

But what do they taste like?
Not like french fries, that's for sure.  And not like any good honey mustard.  The chips themselves are like... super dense Cheetos.  The problem is... when you get this dense it kinda feels a bit like what I'd expect eating styrofoam would feel like.  The flavor.  The flavor is that really crappy brand of honey mustard... the one that almost tastes more like mayo?  You know the one.  The chips themselves are well seasoned and strongly flavored... the problem is that I don't much care for the flavor.

I also don't see any reason for these to be crinkle cut fries.  Other than their shape they're nothing like fries!  I suppose Nathan's wanted to get into the lucrative chip market and decided to make chips of their products.  Hot dog chips... probably wouldn't work as well.  The problem with such a think 'chip' (fry?) is that the flavoring, while strong on the outside, is nonexistent on the inside of the chip which makes sense, but also makes for a blander flavor.

I see no need to ever eat these again, as their flavor isn't great and I certainly wouldn't want to dip them in anything.  If you like that weird honey mustard, though... you might like these?

Rating

Ruffles Max Loaded Bacon & Cheddar

I've heard good things about these Ruffles Loaded Bacon & Cheddar chips so I'm pretty excited.  Also, bacon.  So... you know... my hopes are pretty high.

 

I'm guessing that the baked potato part is the chip, while the rest of the flavors are the seasoning bits.  Somehow I thought these would be orange-r, but they look more like sour cream and onion.  They also don't smell great.  I'm not sure what they smell like, but... maybe a little tangy?

But what do they taste like?
They taste like sour cream and onion with a hint of bacon.  And, as with all Ruffles chips, they taste strongly of greasy potato chips and they feel like it too.  Overall I'm pretty unimpressed.  They don't taste bad, don't get me wrong.  I'd happily eat these, but they're not very bacon-y.  Each chip is actually less bacon-y than the last.  They taste more like sour cream and onion than anything else actually.  If these had more bacon flavor they'd be pretty awesome.

Maybe it's just me, but the flavor I taste most when I eat Ruffles is grease.  The flavor is nearly always either drowned out, or at least muted, but it's never as strong as I'd like.  I just can't get over the greasiness to want to eat more of them.  Maybe I got a bad bag?  I really thought these would have a stronger flavor.  All I'm left with right now is a lingering taste of sour cream and onion.

Rating